Balancing Work and Home Life…

The Problem
Balancing work with a good home life with your children post-divorce.  (This is possibly an issue while still being married.)

The Solution
That’s what we are here to find out!

It’s something we all deal with once we have a family of our own. The balancing act between performing at work and performing at home.  Sometimes performing at home is just being PHYSICALLY at home.  There are a lot of parents that are caught up in their work Crackberries and Smart Phones that we accidentally drown out our lives at home with being “always available.”  I know that I’ve personally fallen into this trap with myself.

Coming home from a long day to a house full of kids can be stressful.  Hell, even one kid at home can definitely add to your stress-level.  For many of us, our natural tendency is to find something that takes our stress away, such as zoning in front of the idiot box for a few hours before our kids go to bed.  While this may reduce our stress, many parents, men and women, both feel guilty for neglecting their children.

To all of the moms and dads who don’t do this; I salute you!  I’m sure we all have off-days but most parents desire to spend quality time with their kids.  Here’s how I think we could start.

Engage Your Children
Engage your kids on their level.  If they are babies, do baby things with them.  Kids and babies love to interact.  Find the toys and activities they enjoy and play with them.

Make the Time
Put the Blackberry down, turn the ringer off and help your kids with their homework.  Show them that you are concerned.  Children learn more from what you SHOW them from what you TELL them.  If they see you fighting with your spouse (or ex-spouse) they will learn more from that then from you telling them that you love their mom.  Kids like to be entertained and involved.

The funny thing is, many younger kids don’t even have to be doing what THEY like.  They just want to play with YOU and be involved in what you are doing?  I learned years ago that my daughter just loves to help (she’s at that age ya know?) so it’s easier to give her something to do which gets her involved and it helps her stay focused.  One time I was putting together an entertainment center and she was driving me batty asking to help.  So I just showed her how she could hold a couple of pieces of wood together and help me out and she was all for it.

Disconnect From Work 
Work is for work.  Do you live to work or work to live?  There’s a big difference.  Unwind from work, it’ll help your heart.  Shut off the Blackberry and Smart Phone and let the aggravation of work go.  It’s easy to be caught up in work, we let it define ourselves instead of just being an extension.  You’re a parent, define yourself in the welfare of your children and focus on them.

Life is short.  It seems like yesterday my daughter was born and now she’s only six.  I’m afraid that if I blink my eyes she’ll be graduating college.  Enjoy the time you have with your children while they are children.  Being a parent is an exciting and demanding job that never ends once you begin.

Written by Jason - http://www.DivorcedDadsOnline.com