Why You Pay Child Support

Child support is often jibed by those who are paying it.  Sure, it sucks to watch hundreds, if not over a thousand, dollars get deducted from your account each month.  Even so there are a multitude of reasons that the non-custodial parent must pay child support and I think everyone agrees that both parents should contribute to their child.

Child support is based on that assumption, that each parent must contribute to the upbringing of their child.  In almost every case, child support and visitation rights of the non-custodial parent are two separate issues that are determined and ruled by the court system.  As two separate issues they are controlled and monitored individually and a primary custodian may not withhold the child(ren) from the non-custodial parent as a penalty for not staying current on payments.  On the other side of the coin, a non-custodial parent may not even have visitation rights but still be required to pay child support to the custodial parent.

I’ve heard from many people, man or woman, about the ‘unfairness’ of having to pay such-and-such a sum to the custodial parent.  In most of these complaints the non-custodial parent feels that they were wronged by the other parent and that the custodial parent is receiving unfair compensation.

My advice, forget about terms like ‘fair’ and ‘unfair’ when it comes to why you pay child support.  Both parents are responsible to raise their child and provide for their welfare.  I pay a significant sum monthly to my ex-wife and it’s part of what I feel I should do.  Fairness, as adults, is a term we should forget about when it comes to ourselves and focus on what is fair for our children.

If you were still in that relationship, still in that marriage, would you not be paying half of the mortgage, car payment, grocery bill, and utilities?  Sure, you would be, if you were a responsible and contributing member of the household and not a mooch.  Why should that change if those things benefit your child(ren)?  Your child(ren) need a ride to school, a roof over their head, food, and heating don’t they?

One thing I’ve seen a few guys do is work for as little money as possible to ensure they pay very little to their  ex’s.  Pathetic.  Get a job, be a man, buck up and pay for the well-being of your children.  If you make more money you may pay more in support but you also MAKE MORE MONEY so that you can provide for yourself and be a healthy parent for your kids.

In short, be an adult.  Accept that fair and unfair are limiting words and put your children first.  They are the ones who truly benefit from your support payments.